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Deck the halls and blow the trumpets. Light up whatever makes that white smoke they use at the Vatican, for a new chonky monarch has been named. Online voters declared a bear named Grazer to be the fattest in all the land, and for the second year in a row. Well, kinda—Grazer is, at the very least, the fattest brown bear living in Alaska’s Katmai National Park.
As in any great story of victory, the satisfying ending comes after a period of adversity. Grazer was anointed by popular vote, beating out her most hated rival, Chunk, by a vote of 71,248 to 30,468. How vicious was the rivalry? Chunk literally killed Grazer’s child. According to the bears’ official bios, the 19-year-old Grazer’s two cubs were with her in the waters of the park’s Brooks River in July when they got swept over a waterfall—and straight towards Chunk. Chunk, the most dominant of the river’s bears, attacked, and killed one of them before Grazer could intervene. The surviving cub came in second in the Fat Bear Junior competition in late September.
Of course, the two bears didn’t know they were competing for the fattest bear title. They’re bears, they don’t use the internet.
The annual competition started in 2014 and has since become a popular celebration of the omnivores. Bears being bears, the competition to see who’s fattest is entirely subjective, as trying to get them on a scale would be outrageously dangerous. Instead, viewers can tune into livestreams of Brooks River and watch the bears fish for salmon. That’s an integral part of their effort to gain as much weight as possible before going into hibernation between November and April. During that period. the bears won’t eat or drink, so the more they fatten up, the greater their ability to survive.
“Fat Bear Week transcends political polarization. It is an election in which every candidate is fit for office,” said Charline Annenberg, founder of Explore.org, a philanthropic organization that contributes live-streaming webcams to the event, allowing voters to witness the competitors fishing for salmon. “The bears have demonstrated their credibility through hard work, skill, and the growth of their waistline. Each aims to achieve the same goal—surviving winter hibernation. They all are worthy of our respect and admiration.”
While Fat Bear Week can help educate the public about the bears, thankfully it doesn’t need to act as a rallying cry to help save the species. Brown bears are not considered endangered, and in fact, according to the World Wildlife Fund, “some populations are doing quite well.” One large group of Alaskan brown bears, who live in Bristol Bay, just a few miles away from Katmai National Park, do face a threat from a proposed, heavily disputed, gold and copper mine.
Congratulations to our rotund, rubenesque, ursine queen. Long may she reign, many salmon may she eat, and best of luck going for the threepeat next year.
