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Disney has finally reached an accord with governor Ron “Don’t Say Gay” DeSantis allowing the state to build new infrastructure—a mutually-beneficial deal between the media giant and state of the Florida—since all roads lead to Disney World.
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The agreement will allow Disney to build a fifth theme park—possibly a water park—in the state on the condition the monolith donates just 100 of its expansive 24,000 acres to infrastructure projects controlled by the state. Disney will also need to hire Florida-based construction companies for “at least half” of its projects, as well as make a generous $10 million dollar donation to affordable housing in the area. The Hundred Acre Woods’ Piglet has been reached for comment, but has yet to make a statement.
The antagonism arose between DeSantis and Disney two years ago, when the conglomerate opposed a new state law forbidding discussion of homosexuality in classrooms. In March of this year, both sides decided to stop suing each other and metaphorically “build a snowman” together, much like Anna and Elsa in Disney’s beloved 2013 film, Frozen. Business leaders and tourists alike have embraced the new deal, as in the words of Robert Earl, founder and CEO of Planet Hollywood International, Inc., “it very clearly demonstrates to the world that the district and Disney are eager to resume working together for the great state of Florida.”
It should be stated the new agreement does not effect the federal lawsuit Disney has filed against DeSantis—which was also put on hold in March—and the company has until next week to decide whether to move forward. While everything currently appears amicable, eyewitnesses claim Uncle Scrooge, the famously litigious CEO of McDuck Enterprises, has other plans in mind.
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