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1 week ago
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James Van Der Beek is opening up more about the difficulties of coming to terms with his cancer diagnosis — and having to reveal it to his loved ones.
It’s been a week now since the Dawson’s Creek star announced his colorectal cancer diagnosis to the world. But before that, he had to navigate the “tricky” task of telling his family about it — which proved to be no easy thing. Speaking to People for their latest cover story, the 47-year-old dished:
“Telling people required a lot of energy. I’m an empath. I like to take care of everybody. I’m a provider, and especially at that point, I was trying to be Superman and be all things to all people and be a dad and a provider. And so to have to tell people and my father and my siblings and my kids, it was really tricky.”
We can only imagine how difficult that has been. James shares SIX children with his wife Kimberly. So having to let go of that “Superman” role a little bit to accept some help must be such a foreign and vulnerable feeling. But he just went about it with as positive a mindset as possible:
“I just kind of went into it with the same attitude that this is curable. I can handle this, but this is what’s going on.”
Speak it into existence!
Related: James Van Der Beek Reveals He Got A Vasectomy Before Cancer Diagnosis!
But while it may have been a struggle for James to open up about it and become so vulnerable, he says the support he’s received has been “beautiful.” Through teary eyes, he told the outlet:
“It was amazing. I’m never the person who asked for any help — ever. It’s not in my DNA. And I thought that was a fine way to be until cancer. The way friends showed up was such a beautiful experience — and I would never have otherwise seen how much people care about me.”
That’s so sweet. What a blessing!
Unfortunately, James wasn’t able to tell ALL the people in his life about his diagnosis himself as he was forced to go public with the news in the media, but it sounds like the support hasn’t been any lesser. And it’s also changed his perception on how he’s been there for others in the past:
“When people offer words of support and just tell me they’re thinking about me, it means the world. Whenever anybody would come to me with a diagnosis or a tragedy, I always felt it was so inadequate to say, well, I’m praying for you. You’re in my thoughts and my condolences. How can I support? I always just felt like that wasn’t enough.”
He continued:
“But having been in this position, it absolutely is. You’re not looking to anybody to solve it for you. You’re not looking to anybody to help you bypass the pain because you’re going to go through that anyway. But when people offer words of support and just tell me they’re thinking about me or tell me they’re praying for me, it means the world. It really is enough. So for anybody out there who’s feeling inadequate, when they just say, I’m so sorry and they don’t have words, that’s okay. I really do want to just shout out to my friends who were able to sit with my pain and sit with my discomfort and not immediately try to solve it or rationalize it, but to just accept it and be there with me. And that’s been the biggest help.”
On Friday, James revealed his cancer is Stage 3, but that he feels “cautiously optimistic.” He told People:
“When I’ve been out of the woods completely for what feels like a responsible amount of time, I’ll circle back and let you know. I have a lot to live for.”
Our hearts are with him and his family!
[Images via James Van Der Beek/Instagram]
