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Marriage is often viewed as a sanctuary, a partnership bound by love, trust, and support. However, some relationships devolve into toxic, even deadly dynamics when these cornerstones erode. This feature story by GODFREY GEORGE unpacks the tragic phenomenon of “killer couples” in Nigeria, examining the interplay of domestic abuse, psychological distress, and societal pressures that fuel these fatal outcomes
“What has he not done to me?” Madam Clara’s voice trembled as she spoke in Pidgin English. A haunting sadness lingered with every word, as she tried to narrate her ordeals.
“Was it when he tied me up in a corner and beat me up because I asked for money for food? Or when in the morning I would be praying on the floor and he would spit on me while going to his workplace? If I complain, he will curse me and another round of beating will start.
“The other day, he hit the back of my head with a shovel. I entered a coma for more than two days. I almost died. He begged me and I forgave him,” she added, her eyes drifting to the floor.
The violence Clara described didn’t begin suddenly.
Jonas, her husband, had been this way almost since the day they met at a vocational training school on Bonny Island, Rivers State. Two lives still brimming with possibility, she had fallen for him quickly.
Before long, a pregnancy forced the lovebirds to start living together.
Jonas, then 26 years old, did what he deemed “honourable” at the time, paying a visit to her parents to acknowledge his commitment.
But it was only an “introduction,” Clara clarified.
They didn’t marry fully until 2017, after her parents passed. It was then that Jonas completed the marriage rites back in the village.
But the ceremony changed nothing.
“When I had my second pregnancy, this man beat me till I fainted and started bleeding. It took the grace of God and the help of neighbours for me and the baby not to die,” she recounted.
For nearly 25 years, Clara lived with him, enduring the violence and raising their six children in the shadow of his fury.
Then, one day in 2018, after more than two decades of survival, Jonas told her he was done. He wanted her out.
“He told me if I did not leave, he would kill me,” she recalled.
The oldest of their children, George, was in Pankshin, a quiet college town in Plateau State, observing the mandatory National Youth Service Corps scheme.
Their second child, Maurine, out of school since 2014, did odd jobs, while their other four children had yet to finish secondary school.
The family’s youngest child, only 11 years old when Jonas told her to leave, was too young to carry the weight of the mother’s sorrow.
“One evening, as he came back from work, he started beating me again. He beat me to the point I could no longer cry. He made a design on my back with the cane,” she said, her voice choked with a quiet, numbing horror.
Her children, desperate to help, pounded on the locked door, begging their father to stop.
But Jonas was unstoppable; he dragged them inside and lashed at them too, one by one.
Despite her deep faith, the relentless weight of her situation left her with nowhere to turn.
“My parents are dead. My siblings are poor; he even told them that if they tried any rubbish, he’d be the one to lock them up after he must have killed me.
“I would have found my way since, but God hates divorce,” she mumbled.
“People have advised me to report him at the police station. Some advised me to call soldiers on him. But if those people kill him, who will take care of these children? My eldest child is trying his best. He is in Abuja. He does everything. This man does not even take care of anything. When he comes to the house, it’s all shouting. If I talk, he beats the living daylight out of me.
“As I am talking to you now, I am ill. My body aches. I am only 48, but see how old I look because of suffering,” Clara said.
For several days, attempts to reach Jonas proved fruitless. Calls and text messages went unanswered. However, on Thursday afternoon, Saturday PUNCH tried once more—and, unexpectedly, he picked up.
After patiently listening to the details of Clara’s allegations, Jonas’s response was blunt: “She is lying. I will never do that to my wife.”
When asked if he still lived under the same roof with her and if he might be open to a follow-up conversation, his tone grew sharp. He said, “Young man, mind your business. I take care of my family. That woman is lying.”
This reporter pressed further, mentioning that there were witnesses who could corroborate his wife’s account and evidence in the form of photos of injuries sustained from the abuse.
At that point, there was a heavy silence on the line before Jonas abruptly hung up. Further attempts to reach him went unanswered, and he provided no additional comment.
While Clara lives to recount her story, still entangled in a marriage that, by all signs, is abusive, other women have not survived such ordeals.
One tragic example is that of Mrs Ogechukwu Okafor, who was allegedly murdered in cold blood by her husband.
Her story, unlike Clara’s, ended in devastating silence.
Ogechukwu’s life was allegedly taken by her husband, Elijah Ibeabuchi, a pastor in Anambra State.
According to several sources in the community, the horrific event took place on August 13, 2024, in Nimo, a community in Njikoka LGA.
While initial information suggested a fall from a building, it soon became apparent that Ogechukwu’s death was far from accidental.
The Anambra State Ministry of Women’s Affairs and Social Welfare became involved when Ogechukwu’s uncle, Onuorah, raised concerns.
He alleged that the family initially received a call from Elijah, claiming that Ogechukwu had fallen from a four-storey building and succumbed to her injuries.
However, when the family arrived at the mortuary where Elijah took the body to, the truth took a darker turn. They reportedly discovered evidence of stab wounds to her neck and chest, a sight that dispelled any claim of a fall and left the family in shock and grief.
In response, the state Commissioner for Women’s Affairs and Social Welfare, Ify Obinabo, vowed to pursue justice for Ogechukwu.
“This is not just a tragedy but a wake-up call,” she stated, urging community stakeholders, women’s rights groups, and social activists to rally around the case.
“We will ensure that this matter is fully investigated and that no stone is left unturned,” she added, promising that she would personally involve the state governor to make sure justice was served.
Public outrage has been swift, as details of the case spread online.
Mrs Obinabo’s call for justice resonates deeply, as many in Nigeria and beyond follow the story, lending their voices to the fight against domestic violence and seeking accountability for Ogechukwu’s death.
Killed over loaf of bread
In another heartbreaking story that underscores the tragic outcomes of unchecked domestic violence, Ogochukwu Anene, a mother of five from Awka, Anambra State, was allegedly beaten to death by her husband, Ndubisi Uwadiegwu, following an argument over a loaf of bread.
The incident, which happened in January 2023, sparked outrage as details emerged from family members and those close to Ogochukwu.
According to sources, Ogochukwu’s first son, aged 14, recounted that his father became enraged after consuming the entire loaf of bread that his mother purchased for their children.
When the woman questioned Ndubisi about eating the bread without leaving any for their children, he reportedly launched a violent attack, using a mirror to strike her until she succumbed to her injuries.
The story reverberated through Ogochukwu’s community and her former school network.
Known for her leadership as the Senior Prefect of Amenyi Girls Secondary School’s 2000 class, Ogochukwu’s untimely death deeply shook her old classmates and friends. Members of her community took to social media to express outrage. They also called on the authorities to ensure justice was served.
In response to the public outcry, Mrs Cordelia Anene, Ogochukwu’s mother, visited Obinabo, to demand justice for her daughter.
Eyes gouged out
In another shocking case, a husband, Lawrence Uzor, an aluminium worker in Umuahia, Abia State, allegedly gouged out his wife’s eyes with a knife early Sunday morning, reportedly for ritual purposes.
Uzor’s landlady, Madam Lovejane Nwaiwu, who was also attacked while trying to intervene, is recovering at the Federal Medical Centre, Umuahia.
According to Nwaiwu, around 1am, she heard Uzor’s wife, Amarachi Lawrence, screaming for help.
Rushing to the couple’s apartment, Nwaiwu reportedly witnessed Uzor assaulting his wife and attacking her with knife.
Community members responded after the landlady contacted them, leading to Uzor’s arrest.
Men as victims
Magaji, a 38-year-old resident of Karu LGA, Nasarawa State, in another tragic event, reportedly took his life after learning of his wife’s alleged infidelity.
The heartbreaking incident, which has sparked both shock and sadness in the local community, was recently confirmed by the Nasarawa State Police Command.
The state Police Public Relations Officer, DSP Nansel Ramhan, disclosed that the discovery was first reported by a staff member of Crystal School Masaka, where Magaji was found.
Officers responded swiftly as his body was taken to General Hospital, Mararaba, where medical personnel confirmed his death. The body has since been transferred to the hospital’s morgue.
The police also stated that they were investigating the circumstances surrounding Magaji’s death to uncover the factors leading up to the incident. However, no suicide note was found at the scene, leaving many questions unanswered.
Meanwhile, allegations circulating on social media suggest that Magaji may have taken his life after discovering that his wife was involved in extramarital affairs with his friends, in exchange for financial support.
These claims, though unverified, have amplified the tragedy, with many questioning the societal pressures and emotional turmoil that may have contributed to Magaji’s final decision.
In another pathetic case, 23-year-old Rahimat Salaum was apprehended in the Federal Capital Territory, Abuja, accused of killing her husband, Shehu, following an alleged domestic dispute.
According to several sources close to the matter, Rahimat was attempting to flee with her husband’s belongings when operatives of the Nigeria Police Force intervened.
The FCT Police Command spokesperson, Josephine Adeh, stated that on July 29, 2024, around 6pm, officers from the Pegi Police Division, acting on credible intelligence, apprehended Rahimat.
“The suspect was reportedly seen loading her husband’s belongings into a mini truck when police operatives intercepted her.
“Shehu, who was paralyzed, had been missing for three days prior to this shocking discovery,” she stated.
During questioning, Rahimat allegedly confessed to killing Shehu after a quarrel, leading officers to an uncompleted building where she had hidden his burned remains.
The Ondo State Police Command also recently launched a manhunt for Mrs Tayelolu Solomon, who was accused of killing her 67-year-old husband, Mr Felix Solomon, with a pestle while he slept at their home in the Government Reserved Area of Ondo town.
The tragic incident occurred last Saturday.
According to the police, tension had been brewing between the couple for some time.
Their son, Ibukun Solomon, who witnessed the incident, recounted that a minor argument earlier that day escalated into a brief physical altercation.
Afterward, his father went to rest on a chair, but Tayelolu allegedly took a pestle and struck him multiple times on the head.
In his account, Ibukun said, “My mother killed my father with a pestle in my presence and fled. She hit him while he was asleep, rendering him unconscious. When she realized what she had done, she hid the pestle behind the house and ran away.”
Neighbours, alerted by Ibukun, rushed Felix to a nearby hospital, but he was later pronounced dead. His body was transferred to the morgue.
The Ondo State Police Public Relations Officer, Funmilayo Odunlami, confirmed the incident and stated that the command was pursuing Tayelolu.
Domestic abuse: A hidden epidemic
Domestic abuse, often shrouded in secrecy, has become a silent epidemic affecting millions worldwide.
The issue cuts across all demographics, irrespective of age, socio-economic status, ethnicity, or gender, though studies show that women are disproportionately impacted.
Defined as a pattern of coercive, controlling behaviour involving physical, emotional, psychological, sexual, or financial abuse, domestic abuse thrives on power and control, leaving victims isolated, vulnerable, and often without a clear way out.
Despite increasing awareness, domestic abuse remains underreported and inadequately addressed, especially in countries with weak legal frameworks and social stigmas surrounding victims.
Research by the World Health Organisation reveals that nearly 30 per cent of women globally have experienced physical or sexual abuse by an intimate partner at some point in their lives.
In some regions, including sub-Saharan Africa and South Asia, the rates are even higher, reflecting a stark reality for women facing abuse in private spaces.
Studies further show that abuse is not limited to physical violence; psychological abuse—characterised by manipulation, gaslighting, and isolation—can also have equally devastating, long-term effects on victims.
The United States National Domestic Violence Hotline reports that psychological abuse occurs in up to 48 per cent of cases, making it a prevalent yet often invisible form of domestic violence.
Experts say social stigma plays a significant role in perpetuating this hidden epidemic.
Victims are often blamed for their situations, accused of provoking the abuse or pressured to stay in abusive relationships to preserve family honour or stability, especially in conservative or patriarchal societies.
This stigma prevents victims from seeking help, fearing judgment or isolation from their community.
In some regions, victims may lack access to resources such as safe shelters, legal representation, or mental health services, which are crucial for rebuilding their lives post-abuse. As a result, many continue to suffer in silence, feeling trapped with no viable escape.
A study published in The Lancet Psychiatry emphasises the correlation between domestic abuse and mental health issues, including depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, and an increased risk of substance abuse.
Victims often develop severe mental health challenges as a coping mechanism, leading to a cycle of mental and emotional trauma.
A senior developmental psychologist, Dr Usen Essien, specialising in abuse trauma and rape, noted that the psychological scars of domestic abuse often outlast physical wounds, eroding a victim’s self-worth and making recovery exceedingly difficult without proper support.
Essien added that unaddressed mental health conditions also factor heavily into these tragic relationships.
Studies, such as those published in The Journal of Interpersonal Violence, highlight that untreated mental health issues, including personality disorders and substance abuse, increase the likelihood of violent outbursts in intimate relationships.
Essien said, “For instance, personality disorders like borderline or narcissistic personality disorder can fuel a cycle of dependency and volatility, making it difficult for either partner to leave.
“Access to mental health resources, which are limited in many regions, could offer much-needed intervention for struggling couples, potentially preventing fatal outcomes.”
Legislation and social services, studies have shown, can play a transformative role in combating this epidemic.
Countries like Sweden and Spain have established robust support systems and laws that prosecute abusers while protecting victims.
However, in many low and middle-income countries, legal protections for domestic abuse victims are minimal or poorly enforced, leaving victims without recourse.
According to the United Nations, fewer than 40 per cent of women who experience violence seek help of any sort, often due to a lack of confidence in the legal system’s ability to protect them.
Domestic abuse is not merely a personal issue; it is a pressing public health crisis. Addressing it requires comprehensive action, including legal reform, education to dismantle harmful gender stereotypes, and greater availability of support services.
By bringing domestic abuse into the open and recognising it as a social epidemic, societies can take critical steps toward ending the cycle of violence, empowering victims, and creating safer communities for future generations.
The tragic toll of killer couples
The phenomenon of “killer couples,” involving domestic partners who inflict fatal harm on each other, sheds light on the darkest aspects of intimate relationships gone awry.
In recent years, cases of fatal violence between couples have garnered considerable media attention and exposed the tragic consequences of escalating domestic abuse.
The issue, while not new, highlights the devastating impact of unresolved interpersonal conflicts, unaddressed mental health issues, and the social normalisation of violence in relationships.
These tragedies are symptoms of broader societal issues, including the stigmatisation of separation and a lack of access to support for domestic violence victims.
Statistics reveal a deeply troubling pattern: domestic homicide is among the leading causes of death for women worldwide.
In 2017, for instance, the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime reported that 87,000 women were killed intentionally, with over half (58 per cent) killed by intimate partners or family members.
Men are also affected, though at a lesser rate, with the majority of perpetrators being partners or spouses.
While there is no universally agreed-upon definition of “killer couples,” these cases typically involve escalating patterns of emotional, psychological, and physical abuse, often exacerbated by mental health challenges and a history of relationship turbulence.
A relationship coach and preacher, Mrs Mercy Chepaka, described these relationships as “time bombs,” warning that underlying anger, jealousy, and an inability to manage conflict can contribute to deadly outbursts if left unchecked.
“For many victims, the fear of shame or ostracism keeps them trapped, with few avenues for escape or recourse,” she added.
Leave to live
Killer couple cases reveal the inadequacies of societal support systems and legal protections for individuals trapped in violent relationships.
Weak or unenforced domestic violence laws can prevent victims from seeking restraining orders or leaving abusive environments, putting them at heightened risk. Moreover, shelters and counselling services are often underfunded or non-existent in many areas, leaving victims with no safe alternative but to remain in abusive relationships.
To mitigate the toll of these tragic cases, experts advocate for a multi-faceted approach, including stronger legal protections, public education on recognising abuse, and accessible mental health resources.
A legal practitioner, Mrs Selena Onuoha, asserts that breaking the cycle of domestic violence requires systemic change and societal recognition of abuse as a public health issue, not just a private one.
“By confronting the underlying factors that lead to fatal partner violence, society can offer alternative pathways for those in harmful relationships, promoting separation or divorce as viable, life-saving options rather than stigmatised failures,” she opined.
Culture and normalisation of violence
Chepaka noted that the normalisation of violence in marriage is a disturbing reality in many societies, where deeply rooted cultural beliefs and traditional values often condone or even reinforce abusive behaviors between spouses.
“While marriage is ideally a partnership based on mutual respect and care, cultural expectations in many communities treat physical discipline, control, or psychological abuse as acceptable methods of enforcing authority or maintaining ‘harmony’,” she stated.
A sociologist, Mr Thankgod Ezechi, said this phenomenon becomes particularly problematic in patriarchal societies, where male dominance is encouraged and enforced, and where wives are often expected to endure mistreatment for the sake of family unity
“Many cultures regard marriage as a sacred and unbreakable bond, discouraging separation or divorce regardless of the circumstances. In many African, South Asian, and Middle Eastern countries, societal expectations dictate that a “good wife” endures hardship in silence, equating resilience in marriage with moral strength,” he said.
Furthermore, in some societies, traditional gender roles are so deeply entrenched that they frame violence as a necessary or even “deserved” response to marital disputes.
Studies, including those published in The Journal of Family Violence, indicate that cultural beliefs in male authority are strongly linked with tolerance for wife-beating, especially when wives are perceived as challenging or undermining their husbands.
In many cases, men are socialised to believe that physical discipline is an acceptable way to assert dominance or “correct” their wives’ behavior.
According to a 2021 report from the WHO, such cultural beliefs contribute to the fact that nearly one-third of women globally experience intimate partner violence at some point in their lives.
Stigma about divorce
Another contributing factor to the normalisation of violence in marriage is the stigma surrounding divorce, experts noted.
In many cultures, divorce carries heavy social penalties, particularly for women. Divorced women can face exclusion, financial hardship, and blame for the breakdown of their marriage, which discourages many from leaving abusive relationships.
This reluctance to pursue separation or divorce is not only due to fear of social judgment but also practical concerns: women in such situations may lack the financial independence, education, or family support to live apart from their abusers.
As Chepaka puts it, in cultures where marriage is a woman’s main social and economic support, leaving an abusive relationship may seem like an impossible option, no matter how dire the circumstances.
The influence of religion also plays a role, as religious leaders in some communities advocate for marriage preservation over personal safety, advising victims to “pray” for their partner’s transformation rather than leave a violent environment. The culture of enduring abuse under the guise of religious duty or traditional values often silences victims and enables perpetrators.
To address this pervasive issue, activists and experts argue for a cultural shift toward viewing marriage as a partnership based on equality and respect, rather than control and submission.
Raising awareness of domestic abuse, improving legal protections for victims, and challenging the stigma surrounding divorce are essential steps. By empowering individuals to seek help and promoting education on healthy relationships, societies can begin dismantling the cultural norms that perpetuate violence in marriage.
