ARTICLE AD
One of the greatest pleasures of a good marriage is love and intimacy, as they complement each other. However, when one is missing or gradually declining after several years of marriage, it can have a significant impact on the relationship.
Many couples today are struggling to cultivate a lasting desire for intimacy in their marriages due to various reasons. Most couples who experience this find themselves drifting apart due to a lack of honesty about their vulnerability, coupled with feeling emotionally disconnected, which can lead to loneliness in their marriage.
If you and your spouse are currently struggling with intimacy in your marriage, you will be pleased to know that you are not alone, and many marriages survive without it.
Marriage is a partnership that requires trust on all sides so that you can enjoy the benefits together. Therefore, the lack of intimacy is not enough to break your marriage.
Intimacy can be misinterpreted
Intimacy can be misinterpreted as being solely about sexual pleasure in some marriages, and having a spouse who can satisfy that desire can be a great source of marital fulfilment.
However, intimacy goes beyond sex in marriage; it involves the emotional and physical connection between a couple, which can be lacking if sex is the ultimate priority for one and not the other.
When intimacy is no longer a pleasant experience for your spouse, it can have a significant impact on her emotional well-being, and she may suddenly find herself looking for other things to occupy her mind outside her marriage.
Intimacy is meant to be enjoyed by both, so be in the moment and validate her feelings too.
Culture can deepen your intimacy
The understanding of intimacy can be linked to cultural norms in certain parts of our society. Certain cultures associate subjects around intimacy with indecent exposure, which can make it difficult to discuss intimacy at the premarital stages, especially among women from these cultural backgrounds.
Everyone’s love language is expressed in different ways, and they say that you cannot give what you don’t have.
Your spouse may have some difficulties receiving or expressing intimacy due to her cultural disposition. However, do not criticise her; you have a duty of care to respect her values and find out how best to support her.
Many marriages break up because couples are not willing to compromise. Understanding the values of your spouse creates the opportunity to deepen your intimacy and show that you truly care about each other.
Circumstances can undermine intimacy
Certain situations in life can also contribute to the possibility of intimacy avoidance in a marriage, especially if they have been long-standing. A man or woman who grew up in a home where love and affection were absent is more likely to struggle with accepting or appreciating intimacy in adulthood.
Perhaps your spouse had a traumatic experience in a past relationship that has left her feeling anxious about trusting again. Her experience may cause her to develop an intimacy anxiety disorder, with a fear of expressing her feelings and an anticipation of disappointment.
The lack of intimacy can also be connected to other underlying health issues and mental health conditions such as stress and depression, leading to isolation.