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Like us all, Nate Bargatze has had his share of awkward, almost shame-inducing DoorDash encounters.
During the comedian’s Saturday Night Live opening monologue for Season 50 — his second time hosting — Bargatze detailed having two drivers deliver separate orders simultaneously and how he once had to hunt for a misplaced delivery.
“DoorDash is what’s gonna kill me,” he began. “I look at it like it’s Tinder, just scrolling through, seeing who’s open … I’m just laying there, like bring me a Blizzard now. I want it right now, lay it quietly on my porch, don’t let anybody in this house know I’m doing this, it cost 3 grand for this Blizzard. All right, I’ll pay it.”
The Hello World comic then said he often “double-dashes,” which entails “peppering the guy, like what else is open around you? They got Nerds at that gas station?” On one occasion, though, his orders from McDonald’s and Dairy Queen were allocated to two different drivers who were arriving at the same time.
“Now I’m watching the GPS, and I’m like they’re gonna come at the same time. It’s my worst nightmare. I need one of them to get in a wreck, it happens. I see them both, they make the turn at the same time. I’m mortified. McDonald’s comes in, drops it off, Dairy Queen has to let him back out. He was just in the cul de sac, like I was having construction done at my house at 11 o’clock at night, just ‘Go ahead!'”
But Bargatze learned his lesson through the experience, opting to purposefully order the two meals from two separate drivers the next time around so as to control their arrivals. When his Sonic order was placed at a “door I do not know,” he opted to “hunt it down.”
“I walked in all the yards in my neighborhood,” he said. “I was on every Ring doorbell in the neighborhood, like a raccoon.”
A Grammy-nominated stand-up comedian, Bargatze will soon appear in a CBS variety special around the holidays, which was co-written by SNL‘s Mikey Day.