The Times of London sent a reporter to Montecito to stalk the Sussexes

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For years now, British tabloids and newspapers have been sending reporters to Montecito, California to stalk the Duke and Duchess of Sussex. It’s a cottage industry in the UK, and I guess it’s a plum assignment for Salt Island reporters. They get an all-expenses-paid trip to California, where they get to rent a car and wander around Montecito, begging people to say something about Harry and Meghan. Every single one of the articles has a judgmental vibe – judgmental about Americans, judgmental about how “their prince” would choose to live in a quiet, elite beach community. Well, right after the Murdochs settled out of court with Prince Harry, the Murdoch-owned Times of London published this piece: “Inside Montecito, Harry and Meghan’s super-rich home town.” Yes, the Times sent a reporter to Montecito to stalk the Sussexes too, just like the Mail and the Telegraph. And that dumb German documentary. This piece is just so sad…

I realise I must be nearing Montecito, the small, unassuming, ocean-side neighbourhood north of Los Angeles that the Duke and Duchess of Sussex call home, when I hear a helicopter purring overhead. The fifth most expensive zip code in the US, here Meghan and Harry’s neighbours include Katy Perry, Natalie Portman, Jeff Bridges, Michael Douglas, Neil Young, Michael Keaton, Oprah and, until recently, Ellen DeGeneres. Their newest is Gwyneth Paltrow, who’s moving into her huge eco-house with her husband, Brad Falchuk. I listen to the whirring blades in the sky and wonder if it’s Harry doing the school run. But I daren’t look up. I am too petrified. I have hired a car in the US for the first time and am bowling along an eight-lane freeway out of LA.

I am here because I have watched the trailer for Meghan’s Netflix show, With Love, Meghan, an eight-part lifestyle series (coming in March) revolving around the Sussexes’ gorgeous, sun-drenched life in Montecito. In it the duchess, glowing with honey skin and white teeth, promises to show us how baking, tablescaping and arranging flowers can be conducted “in the pursuit of joy”, making every moment magical, from sifting flour to eating lettuce.

Convinced by the jaunty soundtrack and how good Meghan looks, I decide to head to Montecito in search of such joy-filled moments for myself. I rent a convertible and take Route 101 up the coast.

They call the Santa Barbara coast the American Riviera, so I imagined I’d pull up somewhere as glamorous as the Croisette in Cannes. Instead, I arrive at an uninspiring collection of low beige bungalows housing a collection of Mom and Pop shops — a post office, a hardware store, a needlepoint shop. Surely Harry and Meghan didn’t move halfway across the world for this?

[From The Times]

You get the idea – this woman flew thousands of miles to wander around Montecito, going into stores and telling herself “I bet Meghan has been here, I hate it so much.” And that’s the whole pathetic story – these papers send their reporters to California to simply be in proximity to the Sussexes, and they’d rather do that than cover the left-behind Windsors. Like, the Princess of Wales and Prince William have been out and about a lot this year. King Charles just became the first monarch to visit Auschwitz. Poor Princess Anne had a life-altering injury last year. Y’all wanna do deep dives on any of that?

Photos courtesy of Backgrid.

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